I want this blog to be about rest, you and God. Not me.
But I need to share.
My son, Josh, was in the hospital again today, but he’s home now. He’s fighting liver disease. It’s attacking his lungs. He’s a sick kid and pain regularly clamps down on him like a vice grip. But we are home tonight. Still, my bags are packed. I will be ready to disappear into the night if he needs more care than we can give him.
I am in a tight spot right now. I am winded, weary and wounded.
I cannot take the pressure of writing about rest, while feeling so depleted.
I have to ‘fess up.
I am tired.
I walk what I talk. I live it because rest has changed me from the inside out. I continue to live in rhythm, but there is little left. The cracks in this jar of clay are wide, leaking faster than they can be filled. I am thirsty for the presence of God at every turn. He fills. He does! But parts of this jar are bone dry.
Over the last 12 months, I’ve been in the hospital with two of our children a total of 89 “nights.” We’ve spent an additional 40 “days” in hospital. On top of this, our other children have had two badly broken bones, two significant concussions, one nasty tonsillectomy, kidney issues and the diagnosis of Lyme Disease. I went into this year tired.
Now, I have a whale to eat. Maybe more than one.
- My house is a mess.
- I have 22 (I just counted them) fine-print “to do” lists that are crying out for attention.
- I am writing a book.
- I have work to do in my kids lives that only I can do.
- Prayers to pray. Tears to wipe. Dreams to discover. Hopes to share. Love to savor.
- And a tank that needs to be replenished.
I know God is up for the task. He always is, but surrender is step number one.
I’m waving the white flag. I’m making a few industrial strength plans for rest. Watching a few others unfold in his infinite care. Staying on my knees.
Lifting my fork.
Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine … Ephesians 3:20
That includes eating a whale, or two. One bite at a time.
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Exciting note! Feedback from the first 12-weeks of posts has been strong and encouraging. Because of this, it’s being compiled into an e-book, a free resource for current and new subscribers. It will be available this summer during a relaunch of the blog and will include reflection questions for personal and small group use. I pray it will be a valuable tool and vehicle of growth in the lives of many. Hold this project up in prayer. Until this relaunch, I will be posting previously written articles and little bits here and there. Blessings!
Is This Your First Time Here?
Welcome!
Run hard. Rest well. launched in March 2013. If this topic grabs your heart, we’d like to encourage you to subscribe to this weekly blog. The information to do so is located on the right hand side of this page. Along the way, we’ve encouraged folks to read the first 12-weeks of posts found in the archives. (But no rush. Go slow.) Start with Week 1 (from March). Each post is numbered and lays an important foundational insight into the life-giving rhythm Run hard. Rest well.
run hard. rest well.
Brenda
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